It’s a myth that the happy times in our lives are the most valuable. They may be pleasurable, but they have little to teach us. Instead, setbacks and obstacles in life that may initially seem like bad news are actually hugely valuable for our growth and personal development.
No life journey, no matter how happy is free from difficulties and challenges- nor should it be. Your goal in life should not be to try and avoid all obstacles, but rather to use them to learn and better yourself. They come in all shapes and sizes, from minor roadblocks that might disrupt your day to significant events that have a long road to recovery.
Whether it’s a situation at work with a demanding boss who steals all your ideas, a major illness or an unfortunate accident, how you deal with setbacks determines who you are. Some seem to have the innate emotional resilience to pick themselves up quickly, while others are knocked for six and struggle to cope. Whichever your scenario is how do you bounce back stronger than ever?
Learn To Embrace Failure
There is a lot of stigma and personal shame attached to the traditional concept of failure. In fact, failing is something we go out of our way to avoid and if we see it in others we actively swerve them like they’re contagious! But the way we see it needs to change, because most successful entrepreneurs will say that failure is a huge part of success. The fear of failing often holds us back, but in fact we should see it as a necessary step on the road to eventual success and something deeply valuable. Allow yourself to feel hurt for a minute and then ask yourself what you can learn from the situation, and what you can do differently next time.
Get The Right Support
To move on from a negative event, it’s important to arrange the support you need. Whether that is finding a business mentor to guide you through a big decision, hiring a physiotherapist to help you make a physical recovery or even finding a personal injury lawyer to help you make a claim, being able to access the right resources is crucial to bouncing back when the going gets tough.
See What’s In Your Control
We expend a lot of valuable energy worrying about things we don’t have a hope of controlling, like quirks of fate and the behaviour of others. But the secret to becoming more resilient about bad luck is reiterating to yourself what you can do about the situation. Say you find yourself at risk of redundancy – there’s not much control you have over whether or not your post is selected for downsizing. But what you can control is proactively polishing your CV, getting networking on LinkedIn and seeking out new opportunities. Having a plan not only puts you on the front foot, it gives you a positive focus. So when misfortune hits, concentrate on your sphere of influence.